Work, Camping, and Owning your Junk

I guess work has been keeping me busy! It has been a week since I have updated! So far work has been coming along alright, even though I have pressed the panic button, forgot to give someone $8 of change, and doubled an order so there was a $30 order that never got paid for. Sigh. I sure hope they don't fire me. At least I'm the one who has made over $20 in tips(two nights in a row, I might add) compared to the other girl who made $3! They better be glad with split the tips between all of us. I have my issues with work(like all the sailor-like cussing...) I enjoy most of it. My manager(who unfortunately is one of the cursers) is really nice, treats us like family, and genuinely cares about us. I mean, seriously, this guy told us to make sure we don't steal or anything, but if we need money or whatever just come to him and we can figure something out but don't think about just taking it cause "you'll get your a** whooped and my mean side will come out. This is the nice me right here, and you don't want to see my other side". I know he doesn't sound too nice, but he really is. You can't really tell unless you see him for yourself(and you could see me at the same time!). Enough about that.

Tomorrow Jaclyn, Julianna, Dad, and I will be leaving for the Father-Daughter Retreat with our church. Dad(and all of us who have been sucked into it) has been the main coordinator/planner, and he is so detail-oriented I hope us girls get to spend at least two minutes with him! We shall see... The main thing I'm worried about is the music my sisters and I are supposed to do. They haven't even told me what songs we're singing, so I hope I can play them! Deep breath, Loribeth, deep breath. This has been one frustration of my week. Lord, calm this anger raging in my heart. Well... it should be good. Pray for it all if you feel called. We appreciate prayers on our behalf. 

A friend of mine tagged me in a note on Facebook, and it brought a few things to the front of my mind. I just remembered how important it is to own your mistakes, heartbreaks, sins, scars, memories, and sad circumstances. You can't just try to tuck it away, because it will always be there and eat away at who you are and how you relate to people(and to God).  You have to take those things, thoroughly examine them, and call them your own... I don't mean you should brag or be prideful about sin or bad things, but just take them and say "Yes, this horrible thing occurred in my life, BUT My God has redeemed/saved/restored me through it!" If you don't own it and let God use it, then Satan will! We do not want Satan taking a hold of it, because all he will do is ruin it and make it be in vain. If we're going to go through all that junk, don't we want God to be able to use it?! I don't want to go through all of that pain, grief, and searching just to let me be in vain. It has gotten to the point where I'm protective about all of it! I would just be appalled if Satan got it! There is so much excruciating pain I've had to go through(and still do deal with) with my brother Stephen's death, and there is no way I want to let Satan use it! I want to just let God get all over it just so the Devil can't! God has given/allowed some things to bring Him the greatest glory and bring me ever closer to Him, and I don't want to waste it all because of my lack to deal with it! I can't stress how MUCH pain and hurt that I want God to use! To Him be the glory! Amen!

A Spring Break Week

I am having an exciting Spring Break! It tends to get better every year. Thank goodness!

I've done boring things like cleaning, watching tons of movies, sleeping, wasting time on this blog and Facebook(even thought I hate the new one!) and everything else you can think of. I really do enjoy doing all of those things, but thank goodness my regular schedule doesn't allow time for things like watching too many movies and spending so much time on Facebook and blog! I would be ruined forever.

On a more exciting note, I have gotten to hang out with some friends this week as well. Tuesday night I went to my friend Shannon's house for a sleepover. Mary, Hannah, and Kara were all there too, and we had a blast. They are truly my deepest, best friends. I am so thankful for them. I would seriously not be here right now if it weren't for their consistent, ever-loving, always caring relationships with me. We all get along so well, and have a fun time together, but we also have many serious conversations that can certainly end up in tears because of our sharing in joy and grief with one another.

I also got to go to dinner, and then back to my house for board games with some friends. We were supposed to go bowling, but it was too crowded. See, the original plan was to come back to my house to hang out, but then when my little brother Michael got the flu, we decided that would not be a good idea, so we agreed to go bowling instead. Obviously, the bowling thing didn't work out because it was too full, so we came back home and played board games outside where Michael didn't leave his germs. We played Quelf(VERY fun game if you've never heard of it), spoons, and then I whipped out my guitar and we sang for a little bit. It was a lot of fun, but I wish we did things like that more often. Who knows, maybe we will!

Okay. THIS is exciting news! I have officially landed myself a job! Mmhmm. A REAL job, and not just babysitting. I will be working at Bobbie Que's Smokehouse, which is literally only about 5 minutes from my house. It was supposed to open today, so I went in to start, but apparently they decided to push the opening back a day and forgot to tell the cashiers. Whoops! The poor things. It's not a chain or anything, but just a "family" business sort of thing, and they are learning what to do to open a restaurant! No joke, I called to get info about applying, and was supposed to start today. Does every job application go that quickly? That is just insane. I'm not complaining though, don't worry! The weirdest thing about this new job of mine is that, ironically, I don't like barbeque! Yes... I AM a Texan(born and raised) yet I do not like barbeque. My family and friends enjoy letting me know that is against the rules, but what can I say? To put it briefly, I am excited about this job! The family (and family friends, I think) that own it are really sweet, and were genuinely sorry they didn't let me know ahead of time about the delay in opening. Although there's been some communication problems, I am confident this will improve once we all get into the hang of things. :-)

And there you have it, my week of Spring Break in a nutshell. We'll see how my last couple days end up. 

This week is Spring Break for all the PSK's(Public School Kids). I took last week off(even though I probably should have done my work) and am excited for this week too. I tend to go through spurts of being anti-social, not talking to anyone, not hanging out, or wanting to do anything but watch movies and read books for a week or so every.. oh... couple months or so. I'm just hoping this week isn't one of them, especially since it's starting out like it will be! What thrills me is the fact that I will only be babysitting one time this week! :-) I am too excited. I think I have gotten burned out on babysitting, just because I do it so often(at LEAST 3 times a week... often up to 5 or 6). Bleh. 

After church today I went to a meeting for the Short-Term Missions at my church. Just a few months ago we hired a new, incredible, inspiring missions pastor, and I am elated that he's here. I just can't wait to see what God is going to do.

And... as randomly noted as can be, I am falling in love with Pandora Internet Radio. Well, I don't love it, obviously, but I sure do like it! My only problem is that I can't think of anything to type in! Go to www.pandora.com and listen if you wish.

In going with the randomness of today's post, I'd also like to mention that I have no clue what I'm doing this summer! Okay, I lied, because I do have an idea, but that's all I have, ideas. I know one thing I'm not doing(going to Mexico), but I have 3 camps I want to be at all summer! I have to split up my time, and I'm afraid I will choose the wrong weeks and miss out! I need to just get a move on it. A new chance came about today for this summer, though. Greg(the missions pastor) is trying to get a group together to go to New York this summer, about he same time as the Mexico trip. New York was supposed to be for Seniors through college(I'm a Junior) so I thought it was out of the question, but apparently not! Greg said that if there are other student who would like to go, and aren't going to Mexico(because they will be at about the same time) are welcome as long as the youth pastor, JJ, agrees. I'm not sure why yet, but I just feel the need to go on this trip. I hope I'm not just listening to my feeling because I respect Greg and would always jump at the chance to go on a trip with him, but I'm listening to a conviction from God that I am supposed to go to New York, and thats why I was not supposed to go to Mexico. See, about a week before and after my last post, I had been considering and praying about going to Mexico with TSMAC(The Student Ministry At Cypress... my youth group. Pronounced tee-smack.). I went last year, was blessed immeasurably, and I'm seeing the effects of it even now, yet I am not going this year. Are you wondering why? Good question! :-) To be honest, I had never really seriously prayed about a mission trip before, and I had a lot to learn. My reasoning was "Why not? Why would God NOT want me to go on a mission trip? He always loves it when I serve others, right?" Well, it's not that He doesn't want me to serve Him, BUT that Mexico is not the way I will bring Him the greatest glory right now. I know it sounds a little silly, but this was consuming my life for a couple weeks! I couldn't concentrate on my school work, was preoccupied most of the time because I was searching for a Word from God! When I first felt the conviction that I shouldn't go on this trip, I was like "Oh... I'll just pray and God will tell me. No big deal!" but God wanted to show me to truly depend on Him, even if it was through the decision of a small, week-long trip. He clearly told me through prayer, Scripture, and encouragement from others that going to Mexico is not for me this year. So sad, but I am glad to help the team prepare to leave and have a successful time there. I'm going to miss my Mexico friends even more! A blessing though, from this decision is that my incredible friend Kara isn't going either, so it will be much easier on the both of us who will be sitting at home or doing something else while many of our friends are on the trip.

Well... that turned out a lot longer than I thought it would. I can get a little carried away. I have some serious prayer and meditation to do about this New York possibility. 

Goodnight, and I hope you have a splendid Spring Break!

It has been a week since I've updated! Oh gee... I need to dedicate a whole post to the retreat, and I am STILL thinking about things from it, so that will have to wait, but I have other (not-so-)exciting things to write about!

At this very moment, as in, right now, I am visiting my wonderful friend Hannah in Dallas! She moved up here around Thanksgiving, and although she visits home quite often, I desperately needed to come see her in her new home! I actually love it up here. The area that she lives in is quite new, and I absolutely love new things! We leave tomorrow to go back home, and I'll miss this break. I should just be thankful for even getting to visit and for my parents' permission to leave home during a school week, but it is just so stinking hard. Sigh.

Yesterday was Stephen's birthday. It wasn't very different for me, but I guess that's probably because I'm not with my family and didn't get the full emotional experience. Wow... right now I h ave a 20-year-old brother. How does that happen? I remember thinking about how wonderful it would be when Stephen turned 20, and I'd be 17, and we could both drive! It was amazing to think about how wonderful and perfect life would be when we would be grown up! It is seriously hard for me to believe that I/my family is getting so old! That baby brother of mine is now 9? What is happening? Life is leaving and slipping right by! On another note, I guess it's good that I'm realizing this now instead of later? I think it's making me appreciate life and the days I have here, and helping me decide what I'm going to do with those days!

Hannah is waiting for me to get off this silly computer so we can enjoy our time together. I'll be back, and hopefully is won't be as long as last time!